There are many sounds you do not wish to hear when sleeping. Sirens. Glass breaking. Water dripping. Then, there is what happened to me last Thursday. Some nights you just want to sleep. Deep, dark and swimming in the nether. Dreams come and go. Fantastical creatures swims by on their way to other adventures. The…
Tag: discworld
Why Is My CAT Getting SPAM?!?
The most bizarre things appear when you cruise your SPAM filter. I am cooking the State Dinner at Pennsic this year and some of the emails appeared to have gone missing so I cracked open my SPAM folder to see if they had gone astray. In short, yes, they had but that wasn’t what caught…
Paleo-what?
Why are people on trendy diets so goddamn smug? Seriously! Not that there’s anything wrong with being on a diet, mind you. I have done some of them myself – although my current waistline might disagree. What is it about these yuppified diets that makes people want to brag that not only are they fat…
The Great Cookie Battle
This is a story of WAR. Deep, dark no-holds-barred war. Let me put it another way Sometimes, you just feel pissy. You just have to have a fight. You know what I mean. There are times when no matter what is going on you just have to rip someone a new one. Puppies barking? SNAP!…
The Dog Ate What?
It is really hard for my husband to surprise me. After all, I monitor the bank account like a hawk as we have been hacked a couple of times so I have a very annoying habit of saying things like “Did you really spend $45 bucks at Steak N’ Shake?” or “You ordered WHAT from…
Rocky Mountain WHAT?!?
Anthony Bourdain I ain’t. Seriously. I do not eat weird food just to eat weird food like he does. For example, I saw him on TV eating deep-fried locusts… The guy ate BUGS! and he liked them! I have a moth fly accidentally into my mouth and I am coughing and barfing for 45 minutes…
Secret Herbs and Spices, Eh?
I have a deep dark secret. One that is sure to make you ashamed of me. I try to hide it but like all deep and dirty secrets it finds its way out. I am an addict. And cannot control it. I am addicted to Original Recipe Kentucky Fried Chicken. There is just something about…
Mikey Had A Little Lamb
As some of you may know, I have a difficult relationship with lamb. I won’t make a secret of it. To me, lamb is greasy and normally has an aftertaste reminiscent of antifreeze. It’s not just that I have had a lot of bad lamb – and I have. Really, really bad lamb. It doesn’t…
Killer Coke?
Did I ever tell you about the time a Diet Coke tried to kill me? Seriously! I kid you not. Actually, soda has tried to kill me a couple of times…True ‘dat! The first time was a couple of years ago. I was driving through the southern part of Indianapolis in my old Kia Spectra….
Coconut Cream Schnauzer?
I may have a bit of a problem. Hello, My Name is Mike and I am a coconut cream pie addict. It has now been three days since my last piece. Seriously. I like nothing better than to slip into something more comfortable and to just dive in. HMMPH! Soooooome people! I meant slide into…
Ever Played Russian Roulette?
I don’t know about you but I really, really hate it when someone messes in my kitchen. And I get really paranoid when it takes FOREVER to get things back to the way they were. Paranoid to the point of ARRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH! Let me explain: My husband has just finished the most amazing makeover of our…
Pride Goeth Before A Fall
First off, I apologize if I haven’t published anything for a while. Planning for SCA 50 Year is taking most of my free time right now. My Saturday nights are no longer my safe haven for writing. And Now: My recent adventure. Hubris can be one’s downfall. I should know – it happened to me….
My Life In Bad Food 