Talk about a shitstorm … YEESH! You ask one stupid question online and you get swarmed. All I asked is “What one food would you expect to find on the buffet in hell?” and you would not believe the flack! I expected the answers would be simple. You know, like lima beans or raw oysters,…
Tag: gay
What Died In Here?
It’s the strongest spice known to man and most of you have never heard of it. Really – BUT you may have heard of some of its nicknames: Devil’s Breath. Corpse Flour. Bad Feet. Or, my personal favorite: Teenager’s Tennis Shoes. Seriously, it stinks. It’s official name is Asafeotidae. The name is a merger of…
Marinated Mammoth?
I am a bad man. I am a bad, bad man. Seriously, I am a bad, bad, bad man. Do you really need evidence? Okay. A couple of weeks ago I was teen-sitting. That is when they are too old to be babysat but too young to drive. My youngest godson, Jaime, and I were…
Why Is My CAT Getting SPAM?!?
The most bizarre things appear when you cruise your SPAM filter. I am cooking the State Dinner at Pennsic this year and some of the emails appeared to have gone missing so I cracked open my SPAM folder to see if they had gone astray. In short, yes, they had but that wasn’t what caught…
The Great Cookie Battle
This is a story of WAR. Deep, dark no-holds-barred war. Let me put it another way Sometimes, you just feel pissy. You just have to have a fight. You know what I mean. There are times when no matter what is going on you just have to rip someone a new one. Puppies barking? SNAP!…
The Dog Ate What?
It is really hard for my husband to surprise me. After all, I monitor the bank account like a hawk as we have been hacked a couple of times so I have a very annoying habit of saying things like “Did you really spend $45 bucks at Steak N’ Shake?” or “You ordered WHAT from…
Rocky Mountain WHAT?!?
Anthony Bourdain I ain’t. Seriously. I do not eat weird food just to eat weird food like he does. For example, I saw him on TV eating deep-fried locusts… The guy ate BUGS! and he liked them! I have a moth fly accidentally into my mouth and I am coughing and barfing for 45 minutes…
Say “Ahhhhh!”
As some of you know, I have had surgery of late and have been a bit quiet in my writing. BUT never let it be said that my adventures in bad food are completed! As a matter of fact, it has even given me material for yet another bad food adventure. So, there I was…
BREAKING NEWS: Wikileaks Stole My –
Can You Believe it? Seriously, Can You Believe It? How dare those Russian hackers do this? Is nothing sacred? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Gotcha! The complete title of this is “BREAKING NEWS: My Life In Bad Food: Wikileaks Stole My Risotto Recipe!” In the midst of one of the dirtiest elections in our nation’s history, Wikileaks released emails…
I Freaked Out the Lunch Lady?!?
All foodies have one: A Secret Shame. Your deepest darkest secret. The one item you crave despite yourself. You know you do. Just admit it. To my mind, fried liver belongs on the buffet table in hell. Same for lima beans and that jellied cranberry crap you get on Thanksgiving. But I have friends who…
Pride Goeth Before A Fall
First off, I apologize if I haven’t published anything for a while. Planning for SCA 50 Year is taking most of my free time right now. My Saturday nights are no longer my safe haven for writing. And Now: My recent adventure. Hubris can be one’s downfall. I should know – it happened to me….
Walmart Really Is The Sixth Circle of Hell
So how does a tire change become a bad food story? Let me tell you… The Ford pickup had blown a tire and we had put the spare on, but my husband, Jim, didn’t like the idea of driving without a spare tire so it fell to me to get it fixed. With a snowstorm…
My Life In Bad Food 