Do You Really Know What You Are Eating?

Or should I say “Do You Really WANT To Know What You Are Eating?” I hate surprises. I really hate surprises. I really, REALLY hate surprises! Culinary ones, that is. For example, I get cold chills when someone mentions a secret ingredient. Chicken gizzards hiding in that soup? Yup. Vinegar in that cherry pie? Yuuup….

The Dog Ate What?

It is really hard for my husband to surprise me. After all, I monitor the bank account like a hawk as we have been hacked a couple of times so I have a very annoying habit of saying things like “Did you really spend $45 bucks at Steak N’ Shake?” or “You ordered WHAT from…

So, The Jerry Springer Show Called…

There is nothing quite like a truly great milkshake. Come on…Admit it. Sitting in an easy chair sipping on a straw and relaxing with my feet up is how I used to spend many a relaxing evening. I have fallen asleep in the chair only to wake up when the glass tipped over and dripped…

Costco Ruined My New Year’s Resolution

Most people resolve to lose weight or to exercise more each New Year’s. Not Me. My New Year’s Resolution: Go to Costco and actually come home with ONLY the item I went there to get. Un-huhn… My resolution lasted exactly twenty-nine days… Here is how it happened. When I woke us this morning, there was…

Rocky Mountain WHAT?!?

Anthony Bourdain I ain’t. Seriously. I do not eat weird food just to eat weird food like he does. For example, I saw him  on TV eating deep-fried locusts… The guy ate BUGS! and he liked them! I have a moth fly accidentally into my mouth and I am coughing and barfing for 45 minutes…

Say “Ahhhhh!”

As some of you know, I have had surgery of late and have been a bit quiet in my writing. BUT never let it be said that my adventures in bad food are completed! As a matter of fact, it has even given me material for yet another bad food adventure. So, there I was…

Secret Herbs and Spices, Eh?

I have a deep dark secret. One that is sure to make you ashamed of me. I try to hide it but like all deep and dirty secrets it finds its way out. I am an addict. And cannot control it. I am addicted to Original Recipe Kentucky Fried Chicken. There is just something about…

BREAKING NEWS: Wikileaks Stole My –

Can You Believe it? Seriously, Can You Believe It? How dare those Russian hackers do this? Is nothing sacred? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Gotcha! The complete title of this is “BREAKING NEWS: My Life In Bad Food: Wikileaks Stole My Risotto Recipe!” In the midst of one of the dirtiest elections in our nation’s history, Wikileaks released emails…

Mikey Had A Little Lamb

As some of you may know, I have a difficult relationship with lamb. I won’t make a secret of it. To me, lamb is greasy and normally has an aftertaste reminiscent of antifreeze. It’s not just that I have had a lot of bad lamb – and I have. Really, really bad lamb. It doesn’t…

Killer Coke?

Did I ever tell you about the time a Diet Coke tried to kill me? Seriously! I kid you not. Actually, soda has tried to kill me a couple of times…True ‘dat! The first time was a couple of years ago. I was driving through the southern part of Indianapolis in my old Kia Spectra….

Coconut Cream Schnauzer?

I may have a bit of a problem. Hello, My Name is Mike and I am a coconut cream pie addict. It has now been three days since my last piece. Seriously. I like nothing better than to slip into something more comfortable and to just dive in. HMMPH! ¬†Soooooome people! I meant slide into…

Mike and the Magical Shoes

I blame my friend, Daniel del Cavallo, for this story: Getting old is a bitch. First, there was gout. Then, there was tendonitis. Now, there’s collapsed arches. No, I do not mean an abandoned McDonald’s. So, how does this become a bad food story? Let me explain. I was not able to volunteer for the…